I’ve laughed until I’ve cried and laughed so hard I’ve struggled to catch breath but never have I laughed until it actually hurt. At least, not until tonight.

It was a bit of a weird one tonight mainly due to the lack of an audience, which I find most strange as I’m pretty sure that the show he was originally booked to do in March had sold out. So yeah, the place was about half full, probably slightly less, which was another first for me as I’m sure every show I’ve been to at City Varieties has been completely sold out, and you could really feel the lack of people. For starters I was able to get into the tiny Stalls Bar that’s normally rammed full of people as most of them either don’t know about the Circle Bar or think it’s only for people who are sitting in the circle (it’s not).

Anyway, there were benefits to it being empty apart from the quick serving time and that was that it made the gig feel all the more intimate, which Jason really seemed to get off on thus making the show simply amazing.

I won’t lie, a lot of the material was stuff I’ve heard, for the most part, at least twice before but Jason performs it with such vigour that it doesn’t matter in the slightest and besides, as I’m sure many people would testament, his set jokes aren’t the main reason anyone goes to see Jason anyway.

No, what everyone goes to see him for, if they have any sense, is his banter with the audience. I can’t even begin to put in to words how hilarious it was tonight and there’s not a cat in hell’s chance I’ll write it all out because, well, it just wouldn’t be the same. That and there’s no way of me remembering it all, though most of it seemed to revolve around his cock. I’ll make a list at the end of this if only to remind myself of the hijinks.

I was disappointed by one aspect of his banter and that was when he got round to talking to me. See, I was on my own and as soon as Jason found out about that I was more than ready for him to lay into me about not having friends or something, which I would easily have been able to take, but no, he sees me as a young woman and therefore assumes I couldn’t cope with that and had me adopted for the night by the family sitting to my left instead.

There were also a couple of new jokes thrown into the show for good measure too - the one about how iPods were invented by women is particularly brilliant. I can’t really post more without spoiling it and plus, it really needs the actions to go along with it.

All in all a brilliant night out.

So, what crap was ad-libbed about then?

Gay builders
These were two guys in one of the boxes who Jason asked if they were best friends. They obviously saw this as a euphemism for being gay and proceeded to hang their hands over the edge of the box as proof that they weren’t “fiddling with each other”. The builders bit came baout when it transpired that one of their friends in another box was a builder.

Robbing shit
A section in his show Jason asks the crowd if they’ve robbed shit. One woman had robbed an eyeliner from a “wee chemists down the road,”which lead to Jason talking about what would happen to this wee chemists as it was so small that all it stocked was this one eyeliner that got robbed and then what men would do with eyeliner (put it on their knobs apparently). Another man also told of his tale about how he robbed a Christmas tree from Woolworths but only got it 100 yards before security caught up with him.

Mummies and daddies
As I mentioned before, I was sat next to a family and there was another one on the end, the first one having children ages 24 and 26 and the other one having slightly younger ones. It was amusing because every so often when Jason said something a bit crude he’d check to make sure he hadn’t embarrassed the children in front of their parents, thus making the whole thing more embarrassing for them.

Distraction
So at some point Jason found himself with a small feather on his crotch and his quick thinking caused him to describe it as “a tiny angel trying to give me a blowjob”. I don’t think anything more needs to be said about that.